Friday, December 28, 2007

Nice try to get more time on the computers...

So can you give me 30 minutes more on the Internet because I just spent the whole 30 min closing all of the pop-up windows?

Dictionaries

Man:  Do you have an English language dictionary?
Me:  Sure, let me show you where they are.
Man:  So, do you look under E for English or occult for evil?

1950's through ?

Woman:  Can you tell me where the books are about the 1950s to the 1980s?

(I try to ask her to narrow it down) and she says...

Everything:  the Olympics, Elvis, Beatles, James Dean, pictures of JFK, everything.

I show her the books we have about the decades, and I find the ones about the 60's first.

W:  I don't want the 60's.  I want the 1950's.  

Me:  Oh, I thought you said you wanted the 50's through the 80's.  

W:  No, I told you I already have that information.  I need the 50's.

--------------

Later she comes back looking for books on the 60's and 70's.  As I search through the shelves trying to find the call #s, she hums a song.  It's not only totally annoying, but it makes it difficult to concentrate!  

Lost

I'm lost, can you tell me which lane I was in?

Valuable Information

Do you have that book on how to diagram a sentence?  I made a copy of the page and my boyfriend locked it up.  Actually, I made a lot of copies and gave them to my friends because it is so easy to diagram a sentence.   

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Thursday, December 06, 2007

The Loud of Turin?

A very . . . enthusiastic lady in a bright pink shirt comes in.

VEL: WHERE ARE YOUR PSYCHE BOOKS AND THE SHROUD OF TURIN BOOK?

Me: Over here, let me show you. Could you keep your voice down a little?

VEL: OH SORRY. ARE THESE THE SYLVIA BROWNE BOOKS? I READ ALL THOSE, AND THEN I LENT ONE TO MY FRIEND WHILE I WAS IN JAIL AND SHE NEVER BROUGHT IT BACK.

Me: Well, here's the Shroud of Turin book. If you could just be a little quieter?

VEL: OH, SURE, SORRY. THANK YOU.

(she goes away, then comes back with the Shroud of Turin book)

VEL: LOOK AT THIS! (She puts the open book in front of Amy and me and points at a blotchy thing in a picture of the Shroud of Turin) THIS IS ME! DON'T YOU THINK THIS LOOKS LIKE ME??

Me: Um, sure!

VEL: IT'S HALF OF MY FACE! AND THAT'S JESUS! IT'S ME! IT'S ME!
DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD?


Me: No...

VEL: WHY NOT?

Me: I don't know, I just don't.

VEL: DID YOU KNOW SYLVIA BROWNE DOESN'T BELIEVE IN HELL? WELL, I'VE MET THE DEVIL AND I KNOW.

Found


I found this paper napkin the Dungeons and Dragons Club's pretzel jar.

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

An interesting PR idea

Today my colleague, who does not look like June Lockhart, decided that the program for this weekend needs a little more publicity.  So, she made a sandwich board to wear.  She taped the PR poster onto a big purple poster board and walked around the liberry!  

You look just like...

Today a customer told my colleague that she looks just like June Lockhart.  We googled June Lockhart, and she said, I hope I don't look like that!

Monday, December 03, 2007

Welcome Back to Marian!

Marian, LII, has returned to the liberry where we first started working!  We're happy to have you back at our liberry.

A Sign

Lady: I need to find out the meaning of a feather.

Me: Okay.

Lady: A goat gave me a turkey feather, so I'm

Me: A goat??

Lady: Yes, he just went over and picked it up and brought it to me and put it right in my hand, so I think it must mean something.