Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Super Liberrian!

Woman approached the ref desk and said-- Hello Miss Information.

and later in the day a caller said--

I was wondering if you could use your massive super librarian powers to help me with a reference question.  

Friday, May 27, 2011


OK, I've known Mr. Purple Book for about 8 years.  And today he said something I'd never thought I'd hear him say.  I showed him where the Mindset book was and he said--  what do I do when I am done with it?  

Incredible!  Before Heather transferred to another branch, she thought about trying to teach him how to shelve.  His routine is to pull books off the shelves, look at them, and set them down on a shelf, but not in order.  

Thursday, May 26, 2011

What's in a password?

Woman:  Do you know the reason why my password won't go in?
Me:  Is the caps lock on?  Or maybe the number lock?
Woman:  That is the reason.  Thank you for telling me.

--an hour later she returns to thank me

Woman:  Part of my password has to do with the man I am in love with, so when it didn't work, I got worried.  

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Valuable DVD case

Earlier this week one of the techs, Miles, received a phone call from a man who had just accidentally left $2000.00 in a DVD case in the outside book drop.  Miles found the DVD with the $100 bills.  A few hours later the man returned to claim the $ and gave Miles a bottle of wine!  Happy ending for all involved.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Ah, the youth...

A teenaged girl came in recently and asked for biographies. "A school project?", I inquired cheerily. "Yeah. I have to read about someone." She wasn't thrilled with the assignment. I said, "Let's get someone you're interested in. What do you like, sports, music, animals?" She thought for a moment, and then said, "Tragedy."

I was momentarily silenced, but recovered my aplomb and said, "Oh, lots of people are into that. Let's see what we have."

Friday, May 13, 2011


This man who always calls the reference desk with impossible questions called earlier this week.  I forget what he asked, but it was something I couldn't answer immediately.  I suggested that I ask the research department and he said--  oh no, I wouldn't want to trouble them.

Then why are you asking me?

Thursday, May 12, 2011


I couldn't find the white pages where they should be, so I asked the customer if I could look something up for her online.  She stated people are wasting electricity on those computers.  I found the number she wanted and expected her to walk away in a huff but she said thanks, at least you know what to do.

Mr. PB found a pencil in a book.  He asked-- can I keep it, or do I have to give it to you?  I told him he could have it and I think it made his day.

Bookmark:  I found a piece of un-chewed gum in one of the biographies that I weeded yesterday.

Monday, May 09, 2011

I love Mondays!

I love Mondays because I have the day off and because of Gale's Funny you should ask email.  Today's reminded me that there must be lots of Mr. Purple Books in the world:

"I don't remember the title, but it starts with an "S."  I think it is orange and blue."

The comment was from Suzanne Guinn of Rogers PL in Arkansas.  The email stated that "the book had recently come out and was on the New York Times' bestsellers list.  We found it."

Saturday, May 07, 2011

Saturday's highlights

  • I found 3 textbooks to request for a phd student.  She was so happy she said--  This is the high point of my day... I'm so happy I could kiss you!
  • Mr. Purple Book brings 2 copies to the desk:  See, there's one hard cover and one paperback.  But I think the hard cover is more comprehensive.  It fools you because it is hard cover.... if I ever ask you about this book again, this is what I mean.
  • Customer:  Wow, you've been working here for a long time. (and 5 minutes later) Another customer:  You are here all the time, do you ever take a day off?
  • Conspiracy Theorist:  Why is it that there are 100 people on the wait list for a book that was just cataloged?  How did they find out about it and I didn't?
  • Caller:  Hi, I just moved away from you liberry.  Now I live at 123 Main Street, Any Town, Any State.  Can you tell me the closest liberry to me and how to get there?  Yes, that's a service we provide!

Friday, May 06, 2011

He really wants a liberry card

He really wants a liberry card (so he can check out DVDs), but doesn't have a picture ID.  He said-- you can call my parole officer, or I can show you my ankle band...

Monday, May 02, 2011

Good ol' library joke

A woman comes up to the reference desk and bursts out laughing. 
I look at her oddly and she says
"Oh, I'm sorry, I just thought of this joke I heard once:  A blonde goes into a library and asks the librarian, 'Can I get a cheeseburger, fries and a shake?' and the librarian says, "Miss, this is a library!' And the blonde says 'Oh sorry,  (whispering) can I get a cheeseburger, fries and a shake?' "


Guy: I need to know how to conquer a woman.  Do you have any personal advice?

Me: I don't know, I've never tried to conquer a woman.

Sunday, May 01, 2011

Just a day's work

Yesterday a customer complained to me that a man is sitting in the magazine area with headphones on with really loud music.  He's singing along and also yelling obscenities that I can't repeat.

Fortunately this happened just when the security guard (Pedro) came on duty.  Both of us went over and told the man he needs to be quiet or leave.  The man apologized.

A minute later the singing and obscenities came back.  I got Pedro again, and he told me he thought the man was drunk.  And Pedro was right--  we found a bottle of whiskey on the floor.  Pedro picked it up and told the man it was time to leave.