Teen girl: Hi, I'm looking for a book written by the same author as the Anonymous who wrote Go Ask Alice.
A woman doesn't want to fill out the online application for a library card. I find her a paper application.
As I'm scrolling through the books on a certain subject the customer asks me to hand her the mouse so that she can be in control.
Homeless Man: You liberrians know it all, so answer me this: Why is a bra yet a pair of panties?
A dad and his kid were sitting at the catalog & overheard these exchanges. As they were leaving, the dad told me-- you have incredible patience!